Category Archives: Award Ceremonies

Award Ceremonies

MTV makes me feel old

The 2009 MTV Movie Awards took place last night in LA, and is airing tonight in the UK. (MTV One, 9pm) There has never a single piece of programming that has ever made me older. I’m sitting here and it just seems to be a bunch of people I barely know about! Zac Efron? High School Musical? Are these people and movies really that successful? And Twilight – I have never known so little about such a popular movie.

Also, I really did just think to myself – this show wouldn’t be so bad if the audience weren’t screaming so much at everything. I am now officially my mother.

Still, this was pretty funny – just when wonder how Sacha Baron Cohen can outdo himself, he just about gets there:


(In all honesty, I actually wanted to post a clip of the Will Ferrell/Andy Samberg/JJ Abrahams song, “Cool Guys Don’t Look At Explosions” – about movie leads always walking nonchalantly away from the massive explosion they’ve just set, causing half the city of collapse into a smouldering pile of rubble – except I couldn’t find it on YouTube. Bah.

It’s the BRIT Awards!

The BRIT Awards kick off in just under an hour, and I am LITERALLY excited about this fantastic awards ceremony!


Having said that, don’t the BRIT Awards always somehow seem a bit poor? Compared to American awards ceremonies, I mean. To be honest, that’s not really fair, mainly because America seems to big these ceremonies up so much that they’re advertised and promoted as the greatest and most respected awards ever, and any other country that dares hold their own music/acting/theatre/sports contests etc might as well not bother because they’re only going to be at the same level as a Prettiest Pig Contest in a small Suffolk village.

But you know what the Brits (that’s the nation of people, not the awards ceremony) do waaaay much better? Bad behaviour. This is really why anyone bothers to watch the BRITS – they want to see a repeat of Jarvis Cocker mooning Michael Jackson, or Brandon Block challenging Ronnie Wood to a fight, or something similar to the Sam Fox/Mick Fleetwood presenting disaster, or Chumbawumba tipping water over John Prescott. Actually, scratch that last one – we don’t really want to bring Chumbawumba out of the woodwork, do we? (Or John Prescott back to prominence, for that matter.)

So, this year’s BRITs will be presented by James Corden and Matthew Horne (off of Gavin & Stacey) and Kylie Minogue. Hmmm. I can only imagine the inclusion of Kylie is to make sure the J & Matt don’t get too naughty.

Duffy and Coldplay are the jointly most nominated acts. Hmmm. Can’t imagine either of those two flashing their bits or getting so drunk they start wrestling members of the crowd.

And…Scouting For Girls are nominated in three categories. Hmmm. Or, not “hmmm”, more like “zzzzz”.

On the plus side, Robbie Williams is rumoured to be reuniting with Take That tonight, so he might kick something off.

And David Hasslehoff is supposed to be presenting an award. And where the Hoff goes, good things happen. Or drink. Yes, drink happens.

The Bitch Is Back

Lily Allen and Elton John got into a bit of a bitch-fight last night whilst co-presenting the GQ Men of the Year Awards. Lily, wearing a totally over-the-top gown and a unusually ridiculous hairstyle, was knocking back the champagne throughout the cermony, even keeping a bottle of it hidden under the presenters’ podium. Elton, wearing a boring old suit but sporting his usual ridiculous hair, was sober all evening. (Probably. He’s a boring old rocker. There’ll all sober these days.)

Here’s the best exchange of the night:

Lily: And now the most important part of the night…

Elton: What? Are you going to have another drink?

Lily: F*ck off Elton. I am 40 years younger than you and have my whole life ahead of me.

Elton: I could still snort you under the table.

Lily: F*ck off. I don’t know what you are talking about.

 Here’s ten pointers for Lily Allen:

  1. Don’t argue with music legends, everyone will hate you.
  2. Don’t argue with someone well known for throwing tantrums; whatever you do, he’ll be able to throw an even bigger strop.
  3. Improve your arguing skills in general – you need to make snappier comebacks.
  4. There’s a limit to how many times you can say “f*ck off” in the space of 5 seconds.
  5. Your last comment is poor. You might just as well have gone “URRRR!! WHATEVA!!!!”
  6. Stop being annoying.
  7. The public aren’t going to wait forever for a second album.

Well, there’s seven anyway. The other three Lily’ll have to work out on her own. I can’t do everything for her.

The Oscars 2008

So, the Oscars took place last night. Yeah, I know, you’d never have known if I hadn’t have told you, right?! I’m sure you all know the winners (generally, No Country For Old Men), who was there (the expected, and the not-so expected…Miley Cyrus? Is she getting any Oscar anytime soon?), who had a baby bump (everyone) and, most important of all, who wore what. Generally most outfits were good if a little blah. No spectacular failures, but nothing spectacularly good either. Hmmm. Maybe the recent writers’ strike also caused a dress designers’ strike?

Here’s my favourite dress of the event – an usual mermaid-influenced number, as worn by La Vie En Rose‘s Marion Cotillard. And she also won the Best Actress award. Yay for her all round!

Marion Cotillard

And for the all-round package, I think Penelope Cruz looked stunning:

Penelope Cruz