Dane Cook’s not going to be happy…

And it’s important that we, the people of earth, keep Dane Cook happy. Don’t ask my why, you don’t need to know the details. We just do.

Now you’re wondering, “Who the hell is Dane Cook?” Well, he’s a comedy actor and he kind of dated Jessica Simpson. Aaaaand that’s pretty much all he’s done in his life.

Oh, hang on a sec, he did something else. A while back, he wrote a funny post on his own MySpace page, trashing the poster of latest movie My Best Friend’s Girl. Cook basically disected the poster in a Photoshop Disasters kind of way. Here’s the poster:

Hudson, Cook and Biggs...and plant
Hudson, Cook and Biggs…and plant

And here’s Dane Cook’s comments: My Best Friend’s Girl Poster – Lead Dane Cook Hates It!

He’ll be pleased to learn that the posters for the movie over here in Britain ave been changed! Phew. Here it is:

Phone box
Phone box

What I can deduce from looking at this poster is that:

  • Jason Biggs plays a character who is permanently panicked. (Given he has the same expression in the other poster.)
  • Jason Biggs also looks like he’s saying, “You want me to do WHAT? To WHERE on your body??! I don’t know how to do that!!”
  • Jason Biggs is very small, Dane Cook is middly, Kate Hudson is massive.
  • Kate Hudson was late for the photo, and swept in at the last minute causing her dress to nearly fall off.
  • The movie poster people now hate Dane Cook. given his blogging, and as revenge have drawn devil horns and a goatee on him before printing the poster and distributing it all over the UK.
  • Dane Cook wears a lot of black, possibly in mourning for this movie.
  • Any film that has a review from the Daily Star on its poster – yeah, don’t bother.
  • What IS Alec Baldwin doing in this movie?

Fin.

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