We all know Amy Winehouse lives in Crazyville. She’s spent the better part of the last two years overdoing the drink and drugs during which time her only bit of work seemed to be fighting strangers in pubs. She wears a hairstyle so high that several small birds – and possibly a few eagles, goats and Ronnie Corbett – live in there. She’s obsessed with a seemingly useless and actually quite ugly husband (or is it ex-husband – who knows?) when she really could do better.

And now’s she bought herself new boobs. For £35,000. Now, Amy, I’ve never had a boob job myself and nor have I ever investigated the possibility. But I had always thought that you could get a boob job for a few thousand pounds these days. For all I know, it’s probably even only £50 + Ryanair return tickets (so, £50.99)  in Eastern Europe. So for £35,000, I can only assume:

a) she’s been totally had – the doctors figured – hey, if she’s that out of it, what will she notice if we charge her a figure with an extra “zero” in it?
b) her new breasts are made of gold
c) or possibly coke
d) her old boobs were in such a sorry state she needed that amount of work done to them

I don’t like the idea of that last one. Grrr. I’m going to have that image in my head all night. 🙁

• The Sun: Winehouse flashes her new boobs