Following on from the incredibly successful television show, What Not To Wear, TV style guru Gok Wan introduces his latest offering, How Not To Sample, in which he advises up-and-coming bands on where they’ve gone wrong in sampling classic hit music.

I kid, of course. But if this was a real show, the first group he’d be helping would be hot young things (apparently), The Saturdays. Their new single, “If This Is Love”, samples the completely excellent 80s hit “Satisfaction” by Yazoo. But it samples it badly. The song uses the same tiny intro bit repeated over and over. On top of that, the five girls (two of whom used to be in S Club 8…snooze…) sing words the medley of which doesn’t really appear to be related to anything. It’s like when kids make up their own song on the spot.

Take a look at the video, which is equally unexciting:

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbC3CqyYMtI]

The Saturdays get ready for a performance in a shop window (in Miss Selfridge on the corner of Oxford Street and Great Portland Street, by the look of things), then strut and lounge around in said window in a sort of moving mannequin-type display. (Which isn’t a patch on the Samantha-from-Sex-and-the-City-comes-to-life in Mannequin.)

Upon completeing their performance, they receive a completely over-the-top response from the crowd outside and their own crew. Which is weird; the crowd on the street presumably didn’t hear them very well through the glass, and their own people wouldn’t have heard them that well either seeing as they were backstage. What is everyone clapping about? That they wore dresses well?!

Let’s ignore them and listen to Yazoo’s original instead:

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wPiMbg4yVWk&feature=related]

Now that, is a song.

And a proper music video, come to think about it.